problem with boys ; they make you think they love you, when they don't.

and right now, you are kissing her,

kissing her like we used to kiss,

and right now you are making her fall,

fall for you the way I did.

just the way I did.

-anna reikvam.

don't say it was the last one, cause I still remember that night, and I do anything to relive it.

I love how you walk with your hands in your pockets 
How you kissed me when I was in the middle of saying something 
There's not a day when I don't miss those rude interruptions.


But I'll go sit on the floor, wearing your clothes.
All that I know is,
I don't know how to be something you miss.
Never thought we'd have a last kiss,
Never imagined we'd end like this.
Your name forever the name on my lips.


So I watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep.
And I feel you forget me like I used to feel you breath.
And I keep up with our old friends just ask them how you are.
I hope it's nice where you are, and I hope the sun shines.
And it's a beautiful day
And something reminds you, you wish you had stayed
You can plan for a change in the weather and time,
but I never planned on you changing your mind.


your name, forever the name on my lips, just like our last kiss.

I'm falling apart, drowning in tears, no I'm not okay, I'm not fine.

Well maybe it’s me and my blind optimism to blame
Maybe it’s you and your sick need to give love then take it away
And you’ll add my name to your long list of traitors who don’t understand.

I'm sorry, I couldn't keep my promise, but you did, and you're a very good person, I don't wanna stop you from falling for her, I'm not that type of a girl. But I'm in love with you, and that won't change in just a day, or a week, like your love did. I'm sorry I'm not that type of a girl. And I'm not good enough for you, but I'm sure she is.

After all... I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.

the problem is that you want us to be friends, close friends,
friends with benefits you once said.
but then again, you also said I was your only one,
and that was just a lie.
It's not that I don't want to trust you,
but you don't make it any easier when you act the way you act.
Yes we can be friends, close friends.
you just got to give me some time to think,
cause I have feelings for you, and it's not easy to just put them away.

I'm sorry

don't say it's over, unless you know it's never gonna happen again.

you make me smile

and we have some moments when we don't even talk

but still I could lay in his arms forever

but he don't want me anymore, and it hurts

I could give you anything, but still I wouldn't be good enough, and I'm sorry.

trust me I'm trying to be.

oh and I forgot to tell:

I'm in heaven when you kiss me, so please don't say it was the last one.

I'm pro at picking the WRONG person to like.

It's impossible, said pride.
It's risky, said experience.
It's pointless, said reason.
Give it a try, whispered the heart.

stupid enough to think the heart was right I listen to the heart.
and I told you that I would tell you when I got really hurt, well now I'm really hurt.

I'm not good enough, well why should I even try to care.

it's the truth.

A guy and a girl can be friends. But sooner or later one will fall for the other. Maybe too early, maybe too late, but maybe, just maybe forever. 

what helps me trough everyday, is that I know tomorrow will be better,

or the day after that.

I'm not letting you go.

i don't care if it hurts.

smile, smile, smile baby, cause that's what I love about you.

“Love is when you shed a tear and still want him, it’s when he ignores you and you still love him, it’s when he loves another girl but you still smile and say I’m happy for you, when all you really do is cry.”


I SMILE

Bruno Mars - Grenade!

easy come, easy go
That's just how you live, oh
Take, take, take it all,
But you never give
Should of known you was trouble from the first kiss
Had your eyes wide open -
Why were they open?
Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, you did
To give me all yor love is all I ever asked, 


Cause what you don't understand is
I'd catch a grenade for you
Throw my hand on a blade for you
I'd jump in front of a train for you
You know I'd do anything for you
I would go through all this pain, 
Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for you baby ; But you won't do the same






I LIKE YOU, I REALLY REALLY REALLY LIKE YOU. 
I DON'T TRUST YOU, I JUST DON'T TRUST YOU.
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU SHOULD DO KNOW RIGHT?
MAKE ME TRUST YOU, SO WE CAN HAVE A CHANCE.
IN THE FUTURE, CAUSE WE MIGHT HAVE A CHANCE IN THE FUTURE.
I LIKE YOU, I REALLY REALLY REALLY LIKE YOU.

the truth is

hey boy, this is what you should do, oh wait you always do that..

1. When she walks away from you mad, follow her. 
2. When she stare's at your lips, kiss her.

3. When she pushes you away, grab her and don't let her go.


we all dream of being that boy's girl, and for one second i was that girl, but i had to let go

I'm not a perfect girl

my hair doesn't always stay in place
and i don't have that perfect face.
I'm pretty clumsy, not so smart,
and sometimes I have a broken heart.
my friends and I sometimes fight,
and maybe someday nothing goes right,
but when I think about it and take a step back,
and I remember ow amazing life really is,
and that maybe, just maybe I like being...
....unperfect.

he told me to not talk about the things I don't have, so I can't talk about you today.

so I smile, cause I have the best friends in the whole world.

and then I laugh because the people around me makes me laugh.

so I look in the mirror and feel good, because someone told me I look good.

and then I cry some tears because I feel I don't appreciate my life.

I could say that the tears I cried was because of someone else, a boy maybe, 

but I'm not going to talk about the things I don't have, that's what my bestfriend said,

so I'm not gonna talk about that boy today, cause he's not mine, I don't have him.

When I see your face there's not a thing that I would change, cause you're amazing, just the way you are

why I fight for you ? because...

I have to look at your face every day, and I can't stand the feeling knowing that you're not mine, so that's why I fight for you, even if it hurts. I fight because I know I can be good enough if I just try, I just have to fight. Yes there will be tears, but there will also be a hope in every smile of yours, in every little laughter there will be some hope. And when you touch my hand I will get butterflies, so right now I think you're worth it.

I'm not scared of the dark,
I'm scared of what's in it.
I'm not afraid of heights,
I'm afraid of pain of falling.
I'm not afraid of people around you,
I'm just afraid of rejection.
I'm not afraid to love,
I'm just afraid of not being loved back.
and I'm not afraid to try again,
just afraid to get hurt for the same reason.


you know what I want











but since that's never gonna happen I have to say

I like you and i'm so close to loving you, but right now you're just like the others, and i don't like the others

I will not cry, i do whatever but i will not cry, cause right now you are not worth a single tear, so i will not cry

just because

sorry

I just don't know what to say,
it feels like I have ran out of words, it just hurts.
I don't know what to so,
it feels like.... I'm just empty.
But still the feeling of not being good enough keep hunting me.
cause I'm not good enough

I live on apples

 that's all I eat, apples. 

it hurts

I'm not blaming anyone else than my self.

I'm sorry for believing you was the one.
for thinking that your kisses mean something to you.
I'm sorry for believing every word you told me,
for thinking you didn't tell anyone else the same.
I'm sorry for trying to go give you my heart,
for thinking you wouldn't just torn it apart.
I'm sorry for trying so hard to be perfect for you,
for thinking you could make me your number one.


for the first time on a very long time I feel hurt,
he hurt me, wounded me so badly. 
and I'm not blaming anyone else than my self.

not your only, just the one you love the most.

do you want me to be like her? do you want me to have that look? do you want me to act like her? is that good enough for you? and is that the only thing that's good enough?

if that's what you want, i'm sorry, but I am me, and not her.
cause if that's what you expect for me, to be like her, i think we can just stop right here.
I'm never going to be like her, do you hear me? NEVER.
and I hope that the only thing me and her has in common is the name.
I hope you don't compare me to her, cause all we did was kiss the same lips.
so don't you dare to compare me with her, if you do I promise you I'll walk out that door
faster than you ever could imagine, so don't you dare.

we act like a couple

he told me he would do anything with me, as long as he got to see me smile, hear me laugh and wipe away my tears once in a while.

we're so fun together. We just do things, unexpected things.

and we laugh, and make up silly jokes.

we whisper in each others ears.

and sometimes we even hold hands secretly in the middle of a class.

we watch matches together, and you get all grumpy when something bad happens.

and when nobody looks we act like a couple.

so I have just one question:
why can't we be like a couple?

11.10.10

“I love to talk to you, I miss you all the time, I can’t wait to see you and I do love you!”
Yes I do like to talk to you, and when you say those kind of words I get this wonderful feeling,
but then I  start to wonder does you really mean it, or are you just that type of guy who says stuff like that all the time?
I don’t feel like I know you, that’s my problem, I feel I know a person the person you pretend to be.

It may just be me, always so insecure, but I have my reasons to have my doubts.
and I’m sorry for being so insecure, but then again I’m not sorry.
Why should I be? I mean like what is the reason for me to feel sorry,
you’re not effected by what I do, cause you are already happy,
it doesn’t really matter to you, cause you already have a girl.

But to me, it does really matters,
cause I’m not as happy as you, and I KNOW you effect my happiness,
I don’t have a boy who loves me, and only me.
but still I feel like I have a chance with you, even though I don’t.

So that’s how I spend my day, wondering if we could ever end up together.
and I know it may seem like a hopeless hope In the middle of this,
but I have learned that :
“ the heart want what the heart want, and there’s no point going against your heart.”

.my heart want you.

Life, love and laughter.

There was a time when I was quite insecure about life, love and even laughter. It felt like I had falling in love a million times, but then again I hadn’t met you.

You were like one of those guys you see in the movie, who just lights up a girl face and then she falls in love with him with just one little conversation.

I’m not so sure of what happened with my feelings for , I just know that once I was lying in bed and then suddenly I felt a feeling I had never felt before,

I missed you so much it was quite insane, and when I closed my eyes I saw you’re face and I just wanted you so badly it was like I said insane.

I still feel like you’re a part I need in my life, an important one.

You take way the feeling of being insecure, you make me wanna live, love and laugh.

I need you, I really do, and I’m sorry…

But I’m falling in love with you.

I’m sorry for the way you make me feel

You told me you hoped things wouldn’t change between us when you come back,

Even if we had kind of a dramatic ending or it wasn’t really dramatic either,

It was just not the way we thought it would end.

Maybe it was just how we hoped it would end, or at least it was what I hoped for.

So I’m sorry or the way you make me feel,

It’s not meant to be this way you know, I’m not supposed to feel this way,

Not for YOU. Cause you are only destroying me, from the inside to the outside,

And one day I’m pretty sure I wake up and feeling wounded and hurt.

That’s the thing I just walks around in this perfect world, waiting for just one thing.

Waiting for you to hurt me, and I get all stressed out because you haven’t done it.

I know I’m not supposed to feel this way, being afraid of being hurt,

But that’s the thing I’m not afraid, I just accept that it might happen.

Hoping for the best, but accepting the worst,

And I’m sorry for the way you make me feel. 

can you feel the magic in the air?

it must have been the way you kissed me. 


He took my hand and pulled me up from the bed, we stood close.
With my arms around his neck, and his arms around my hips,
closing my eyes for a second, and then he was kissing my lips.
It wasn't the short one when we both regret,
and when I pulled him away, he said is that all I get?
Smiling because of a charming man,
he pulled me close and kissed me again.
I didn't want to get out of that room,
going to miss you, I'm leaving so soon.
Then he looked me in the eye,
said that he hated to say goodbye.
But we both knew that it was only a week,
so we hugged goodbye and then he kissed me on the cheek.

time slows down
whenever you're around
I can feel my heart
it's beating in my chest
did you feel it?
I can't put this down
but can you feel this magic in the air?
It must have been the way kissed me
fell in love when I saw you standing there,
it must have been the way.

I'm not going to talk about yesterday, because there was this other boy who say I did it to much.

Last night was a great night, and I'm happy right now, and that's all that really matters.

what do you want right now? just tell me.

Can I disappear with you? because you don't ever deserve to be alone.
That's why I'm here, that's the reason we got this chance to get to know each other,

because there is a meaning, and the meaning is that I'm supposed to be with you.

sometimes you don't get everything you wished for, that's why I try to make the best out of what we already got.

"you wanna play the game? It’s like this: we play around. we have fun. we share our secrets. we tell stories. we cry on each others shoulders. we hold hands.we think about forever, but we do not fall in love, because the first one who does, loses."

sometimes people play hard to get to make sure that the other person's feelings are real.

'Cause in the end it all hurts just the same.


it's better to be loved, used and broken, than being not loved at all.

just take me for granted

Before you let me fall,
Kill me so I don't feel it at all
And Push my body up against the wall
And pick your poison
'Cause everything feels wrong
And I don't know where I belong

Take me for granted
Make me feel used
Leave me in pieces
Misery is company
Cuz I know that it's real
I've learned to love the pain
'Cause that's the only way that I know how to feel

Maybe it's a phase
Maybe I'll break out of it someday
Maybe this is just my twisted fate
I always feel like everything is wrong
And I don't know where I belong

Take me for granted
Make me feel used
Leave me in pieces
Misery is company
'Cause I know that it's real
I've learned to love the pain
'Cause that's the only way that I know how

todays feeling

The fact that she had to let her go, 

it teared her up inside,

she had tried so hard to put it all togheter,

now everything was falling apart.

With no one to blame,

she blame it all on her self.

Like it was her fault,

that they didn't get chance to catch up 

all the memorize who was made before.

She tried to hide it all inside,

wouldn't face the truth, be brave, be brave.

the tears she hold back inside,

even if it hurts, be brave, be brave.

The tears was in her eyes now,

she had to be strong,

told her self it was all empty,

but then it proved she was wrong.

Her smile was slowly fading,

as she wiped away her tears,

the truth she was facing, 

was worse that she had thought.

She tried to hide it all inside,

wouldn't face the truth, be brave, be brave.

the tears she hold back inside,

even if it hurts, be brave, be brave.

the acting was over,

she thought she was strong,

the tears wouldn't stop,

when she realized her friend was gone.

I don't want you to see my like this. I'm stronger than this.

you are my guiding soul, all I need is you

and it was like not could ever come between us, ever again.

we are like brother and sister, you and I.
people can separate us if they really want to, but you know deeply in your heart that I will always,

and hear the word ALWAYS, stay with you and support  you.

the thing is my friend, there doesn't go a day when I'm not thinking of things we did together.

the memories will stay in my heart forever.

So yes we fight, we fight about the most silliest stuff, and yes I can go days without talking to you, 

but that's just because I know that in the end it will all work out.

this time I wasn't sure, I did not think that we would actually figured things out,

but we did, even if it took almost 2months. 

That just prove the fact that no matter what will always find away to solve or problems,

cause we do really need each other.

So you should know that "brother", no matter what I'm always here for you,

it doesn't matter what your problem is, I'm always here.

so keep that in mind all the time, you can tell me everything.

\\yes I do really love you, with all of my heart\\

When you love, you get hurt. When you get hurt, you hate. When you hate, you try to forget, When you try to forget, you start missing. When you start missing, You fall in Love Again ♥

I was in love, and got hurt. I started to hate the boy I used to love, and I tried so hard to get him out of my head. He slipped away and I started to miss, but then this other boy came along and I forgot how complicated love is. So I fell in love all over again, and the hate part has not come yet, but when that day come I tell you about it. That's a promise.

Good times are like pizza. You savor the moments one by one and then your realize soon after that it’s all gone.

Right now all I wanna do is sleep, cause as soon as I close my eyes I feel your arms around me.

and right no that's all I really need, cause every time I feel you close, I know what happiness are.

You put a smile on my face with just saying some simple words, 

you make me laugh without even open you're mouth.

I don't know what it is, but there is clearly something special about you.

cause every moment with you are the best moments in my life.

Happiness are wherever you are.

have you ever felt like nothing really matters, that whatever you do it will not change anything.

Like you could just go and drown yourself, cause it doesn't really matters to anyone anyway.

It's the thought you get in the morning when you wake up feeling alone and insecure, and this follows you all day, and get's even worse when you fall to sleep. It's not that "i have no friends" lonely feeling. It's more that "there isn't one special boy in this world who loves me, and only me" lonely feeling. Every time you see your self in the mirror, even if you just walk by, you feel ashamed. You feel like that face is not worth a shit, like you are the ugliest person in the world.

I keep writing and opening up, to everyone. But when I tell something straight to a person they really means something to me, they are special in my eyes.I'm sorry for being a mess, and I'm sorry for not telling anyone about it.I'm do not thinking that it best if I hold it all inside, but right now I don't wanna talk about it. Next week will be a mess, I guarantee that. But you my friends, you know how strong I can be right?! One of you will be leaving, and that really sucks. He will be leaving the week after that, but the different is that he'll come back, and you my friend you won't, at least not for now. I'm in love with him, you all know that, and to be honest that really sucks. It's really hard to know that there is another girl in his arms right now. So that's all I wanted to say, for now. I do have problems with telling straight to all of my friends what I really feel right now, so I tried to tell it here. I love you, and you, and you! <3 and I'm really sorry for everything. 

you always know what to say, and when to say it. You stay with me all the time, when ever I need you. Music, will you be my boyfriend?

Mine - Taylor swift

One shot - JSL

The only exception - Paramore

Impossible - Shontelle

Stay - Miley Cyrus

Save your heart - Mayday Parade

DO NOT LET ANYTHING THEY SAY GO TO YOUR HEAD

............l............o.............s.............t.................

waking up, lost and insecure.
Today I don't wanna to do anything
drill my head into the pillow
fall to sleep.


Waking up, tears filled my eyes,
the second best have to get out of bed.
putting my cloths on,
one look in the mirror feeling like nothing.


Looking in the mirror  eyes filled with tears,
have you ever felt like you're nothing,
that's what I feel like right now,
it doesn't matter what I do.


this is me, every morning,
this is the truth.
I don't know if you care.
I don't care if you don't care.
but here is the truth.

If you love someone put their name in a circle, not a heart, because hearts can be broken but circles go on forever!

I put your name in a circle, sitting on the floor in my room. 

The room feels empty, but still it looks like a mess.

Looking like a mess I sit on the the floor in my room who also look like a mess,

it's not without a reason we're staying together.

I think about what happened yesterday,

it's really silly thoughts, like why I did not kiss you.

Kissing you gives me one of the greatest feeling in the world.

but this feeling doesn't really matter when she's around.

She call and text you all the time, and you know that.

You said she could be a pain in the ass sometimes.

If she's such a pain in the ass, why don't you just dump her.

There must be a reason why you always smiling around me.

You make me smile, and you somehow know how to make me laugh.

The smile on your face when you're  around me,

don't say it doesn't mean anything.

There must be a reason for everything.

I put your name in a circle sitting on the floor in my room. 

The room feels empty, but still it looks like a mess.

Looking like a mess I sit on the the floor in my room who also look like a mess,

it's not without a reason we're staying together.